Being single during covid was to put it mildly not much fun but on the flip side it was an opportune moment in time to reflect on what direction I wanted to take with regard to relationships and my sexual journey going forward.
In summary I can to the conclusion that my sexual fulfilment required balance.
So what does balance look like for someone like me? I’m pretty sure that ultimately each and every one of us has a core need to be cared for and loved regardless of what mask of independent self-sufficiency we present to the outside world.
However, from the perspective of a swinger how can this be achieved without having to sacrifice the freedom to fully express one's sexual desires. During lockdown as much as I ached for sensual kisses and a woman’s head on my chest in a gentle embrace. The longing to once again fuck other men’s wives was almost as intense.
Deep into the core of who I am I knew that I wasn’t prepared to ever give one up for the other ever again but how was I to achieve this balance that I so desired?
I knew that the most sensible path would be to seek out genuine companionship first. Of all the options available to me OKcupid looked to be the best of a variety of imperfect solutions. Tinder wasn’t going to work for two reasons a) I think its best suited to a younger age group and b) Having to explain my ethically non-monogamous stance on dating with vanilla women would have been mentally exhausting.
Luckily OKCupid gives you the option of stating that you a non-monogamous in your profile. That made it so much easier to reach out to women with goals and desires that are likely to be similar to my own.
Boy did I get lucky!!
About a year ago a sexy intelligent very naughty woman in her 40s reached out to me and we started seeing each other. She recently told me that she loves me and I kid you not I had goosebumps all over my body and temporarily lost the capacity to speak...........wow!!!......now where was I?
Back when we first met because she was still relatively new to the lifestyle. Not that she needed it but I encouraged her to carry on doing what she was already doing. She was going on dates and attending swinging parties as a single woman. I made a point of not going with her at first because I wanted her to make discoveries for herself and work out what is fun and pleasurable without having to factor in how I would be feeling If I had been stood next to her at these parties.
I naturally ensured that I was always available to give her support when needed and ensured that she was able to benefit from my advice based on years of experience as a swinger and kinkster.
During this period, I have separately been reaching out to couples in the hope of finding one that is a good match for my current circumstances. Although I’ve had some amazing one off adventures in the past, I have now come to the conclusion that the best way to get the most out of the cuckold dynamic is to have fun with a couple that lives local enough to be able to meet up with easily.
Finding a good match in the world of cuckolding is an agonisingly slow bittersweet process for most people but it always feels worth the wait when it finally happens. That said I haven’t exactly been idle in the meantime. My partner and me are still in the head spinning honeymoon phase of our relationship and we recently attended our first interracial swingers party together. Boy was that interesting.
At one point I was stood at the edge of a balcony overlooking the dance floor discreetly observing my two lovers at the time both dressed as nurses introducing themselves to each other. Both were also being chatted up by very flirtatious black men. One of them like me was dress up as a doctor and the three of us later ended up in one of the private rooms. Two doctors and one nurse that is, I will tell you all about that little adventure in another blog ;-)
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