The cuckold emissary vs the FLR cuckoldress PART TWO

It’s been a long time coming but now feels like a good time to finally bring this two part blog to its natural conclusion. Lockdown is now a reasonably distant memory and my enforced 18 month celibacy is just as distant…..thank fuck for that right?

I’m grateful to now be in a much better position. I’m no longer single and I’m lucky enough to have a partner who is totally accepting and understanding of my long held addiction for couples. This by the way is no accident. Covid has had the effect of reinforcing my belief that life is there to be lived and that one shouldn’t compromise on what one wants. Naturally there is a caveat, it being so long as no one else is hurt or harmed.

Anyway, in the first part of this blog I touched on the subject of cuckold couples that have a dynamic that is totally led by the female half of the couple. Based on what I know I would have to conclude that truly female led cuckold relationships (FLR) are extremely rare. However there does appear to be a sizable proportion of couples in which it is something of a grey area. What do I mean by that? Well in all my years of meeting couples I can only think of one with whom the whole get to know you process was with the lady until finally meeting in person. That was a strange one for me because I usually have a very good idea of what makes the cuckold tick. It worked out very nicely though. They were one of the two couples that I met at the very last party I attended before covid. Within moments of finding a room to play in as soon as I leaned over the sexy lady he sank to his knees parted my cheeks and worshiped my arse with his tongue.........without being prompted, he seemed very content 😈

Now where was I ah yes, within the FLR spectrum most of the time the first move will have been made by the couple together and over time once trust has been established the cuckold takes a back seat leaving me and his love to get closer to each other to form a nice bond. 

Bond huh. Talk about playing with fire remember the first part of this blog when I mentioned that lifestyle cuckolding is a bit like an extreme sport? Boy did I fuck up in my early days. This was back when I played with couples in more of a hotwife dynamic. I don't think I even knew of the existence of the word cuckold in those days. Anyway I used to text and call one particular wife on a very regular basis.. I'm talking multiple text messages on an almost daily basis. Long story short we both confused lust and infatuation with love and......oh boy were we silly. Retrospectively comical in some ways but still very very.......very silly. 

From time to time her husband would text me saying no calls/text's tonight I need my wife to myself and although I always respected and went along with his specific requests I was in way too deep. I hasten to add that I never repeated that mistake and the lessons of that "relationship" have served me well with knowing what lines not to cross. Life is a classroom right?

One of the biggest lessons that I learnt was although you can't control feelings you can control what you do about them and when you nurture those feelings that's a conscious decision. Some of you may disagree with this conclusion but it's my truth. This is how I navigate the potentially dangerous minefield when everyone has agreed to meet on a regular basis.

This leads neatly on to some of the differences between getting close to a couple with a FLR dynamic. It's a different kind of "interview" process. Of course I can't claim to be intimately knowledgeable of the mind of a woman but I do think I've picked up a few insights over the years. I think a woman wants to feel safe with her Bull not just physically but emotionally too and one area of caution from the hotwife's perspective is her need to be sure that the Bull doesn't forget the boundaries that are set by a couple. An experienced Bull will know this instinctively so even if he is dealing with an inexperienced couple he will know what lined not to cross and crucially he will never exploit his superior knowledge to the detriment of the sanctity of the couples relationship.

An inexperienced single male who hasn't done his homework might charge in head first like a ..........Bull 🤣 and get carried away with what I call the fake pantomime of humiliating the cuckold. A more experienced Bull will never assume that the cuckold craves humiliation and knows that even if he does they may not want it to be directed at them by the Bull. When a Bull conveys this understanding to the lady and sees that outside of "play" the Bull clearly respects the man she loves it frees her to let her guard down and that's when all the fun begins 😈

This Is Why You Can't Fuck My Girlfriend If You're Straight

You probably wouldn't be surprised to discover that my desire to fuck other men's wives' and girlfriends is deep and to my core. However it may surprise you to know that my desire to see my girlfriend fucked by other guys is also deep rooted. Hell as the years have passed this desire has grown stronger. So much so that it's in danger of matching my lusts and cravings as a Bull. Come to think of it I probably enjoy both scenarios all the more because I can relate to the pleasure from more than one perspective.

However there is a bit of a catch, based on past experiences its just not as much fun for me if the man fucking my lady is straight. My apologies if this comes across as a bit harsh and overly simplistic but broadly speaking straight guys tend to fall into one of two camps. Naturally there is always going to be a bit of an overlap but here goes.

CAMP ONE

This camp is populated by the outwardly nervous straight guy. This guy doesn't really want me in the room but for the chance of a fuck he's willing to give it a go and will try to use a few mental tricks to zone me out and pretend I'm not there. He may be concerned that I'm eying him up and trying to figure out a way to pounce on him. So because of this concern he is never totally at ease and will struggle to stay in the moment and enjoy the sweet pleasures of my sexy girlfriend. I consider myself to be a bit of an empath and because I will sense this I too will struggle to be in the moment because I will then be using strategies of my own to try to put him at ease.

CAMP TWO

This camp is populated by the outwardly confident and alpha males. This guy doesn't really want me in the room either but his motives are a little different. He wants to fully unleash his lusts on my lady and will feel somewhat held back by my presence. For the time that he is in the room he wants her to himself and the idea of "sharing" doesn't come naturally to him. His natural instinct is to also mark his presence by showing both of us who's boss. This too will be sensed by me so instead of enjoying the experience my competitive instincts will kick in and the whole experience will be ruined because in those scenarios I will cut things short and that's no fun for anyone.

I think I should take the time to hold my hand up and take some responsibility for the above type of scenarios. They have only ever happened in a club environment where adrenaline can be high and decisions can sometimes be made on impulse. In my ideal world we've had a chance to meet socially to first find out if we're likely to be a good match. 

CAMP THREE (the exception to the rule)

Yep you guessed it the title of this blog is click bait lol. Straight guys have fucked my partners over the years but they will have been people that we've got to know so everyone feels comfortable relaxed and horny.

It's so much more fun when they're bi!!!

Why? Because even if there is no play between the guys the vibe is almost always so much more relaxed. No-one is tense or worried about body parts touching and there is no sense of competition so working together as a team to give pleasure to my sweet lady just feels more natural and instinctive.

It also means I can get really close for a good view of another mans cock sliding in and out of my lady's pussy which more likely than not will be soaking wet because she is as turned on by the thought of being very naughty in front of me as I am proud to have a card carrying slut as a lover. That image can replay and  remain vivid in my head for weeks and boy is it horny as fuck.

The guy being bi means I'm free to stroke his cock and guide him back in if he slips out and I can cup his balls while whispering filth into my girlfriends ear.

Another perk of MMF threesomes is that there is never ever the whisper of beginning to feel like a third wheel. Although I can be a perfectly respectful voyeur (and enjoy it) when watching other couples fuck waiting patiently on the sidelines as a voyeur makes me restless when its my own girlfriend I just can't do it. So if the guy inside her has stamina and the two of them get lost in the moment I always have the option of keeping my cock warm with his mouth. For some strange inexplicable reason guys tend to fuck with a greater sense of urgency when I do that ;-)

Desire vs fetishization – My take when its interracial

Maybe it’s all in my imagination but these days we seem to be living in a world of tribalistic extremes. Something that makes absolutely no sense to me because there is nothing more complex than the mind of a human being.

My sex life has often had an interracial dynamic but I am always aware that there is sometimes a delicate balance to be had and I am mindful not to inadvertently fetishize someone with a background different to my own or indeed put myself in situations where I feel fetishized.

I love what feels safe and familiar some things need not be communicated verbally…….you just know. But I am also forever curious about what makes us all different. When I watched a white guy fuck my ex I found it sexy as fuck and I tapped into my wank bank streaming service for weeks afterwards.

On the flip side when a guy guides my cock into his lady and her skin complexion is different to mine it’s sexy as fuck when all three of us get to admire the contrast as I slide in and out of her special yummy place. That curiosity for something different has certainly played a role in my non-monogamous sexual journey over the years. However on the flip side because I’m repelled by fetishization I was and never will be the “perfect” swinger. Even before I heard the word I have always drifted in the direction that could lead to polyamory and shied away from ONS whenever possible.

It's easy to side-step the extreme end of fetishization because the tell-tale signs soooooo blatantly obvious. With the more subtle levels it not so easy but in my experience pausing, not making assumptions and taking the time to get to know a person always helps.